When I was little, I was positive that the desire to run home and cry because I was “being left out” would disappear once I was older. If I was a dishonest person, I could tell you that this is exactly what happened. But I’m not, so I can’t. Being left out happens. Some things that I (as well as many others, I’m sure) have felt left out of in the past year have been: relationships, marriage, missions, plans, hang outs, dinner groups, family, common ideas, friend groups, internships, getting good grades, and so much more. But it happens.
Being quite frank, I have felt out a lot this year. I was an adjustment to move from a ward where I knew EVERYONE to ward where I knew NO ONE, as it always is. But it was different this year when that status didn’t change in 48 hours like it had in the year previous. In fact, it didn’t even really change for months. I knew my roommates. I knew a few people in my relief society, and the 8 guys I had met and become friends with in the ward.
When I was growing up, and all the way through high school, there was a peculiar phenomenon that would happen. I realized I am really good at making friends initially. I can make friends quickly, genuinely, and have a lot of fun with them. That goes along all fine and dandy for a while and then there is a breaking point. Either I would introduce those friends with some of my other friends, the two groups would merge and leave me behind, or I would just get kind of forgotten as everyone became good friends without me.
That was hard, but since I turned around and made other friends fairly quickly, it was never too paralyzing. Just mostly a bummer.
That happened to me even some this year. Friends outside of my ward from other areas of life would hang out with me for a little while, we’d meet some new people, and I’d become the forgotten friend. To be totally honest, I have been so incredibly busy this semester and last semester that it hasn’t had a huge effect, but still just made me feel kind of.. off.
But, I FINALLY feel like I’m needed in my ward. I got a new calling that has given me the opportunity to get to know so many more people. I started making friends with a select few that are really involved. And I’m starting to feel known, welcome, and wanted.
My friends, that is one of the most priceless feelings. Feeling wanted. Feeling cared about. Feeling needed.
And whether it comes right away, or far later down the road, it is most definitely worth waiting for.